A few thoughts

Psalm  73:25- "Whom have I in heaven but You? And besides You, I desire nothing on earth."


1. Is this truly my way of thinking? 


But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God's own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who has called you out of darkness into his marvelous light; for you once were not a people, but now you are the people of God; you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.


2. Do I live to proclaim His excellencies? Does that motivate me? 


Mark 9:21-24

 Jesus asked the boy’s father, “How long has he been like this?”
   “From childhood,” he answered. ²² “It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”
   ²³ “‘If you can’?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for one who believes.”
 ²⁴ Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!”

3. Faith in Christ/trusting Him for the big things (Salvation, existence, sovereignty etc) and for the little things (friendships, plans, agenda, goals etc) Do I truly desire to have childlike faith? Wonder? Amazement? 

A few of the things I've been thinking about, praying about, and wrestling with. God has been good to give me plenty of things to think about while here! Thanks for praying that God would use the time while I'm here to grow and teach me. Please continue to pray that I'll be able to process everything well. Don't we all need need help with that! God Bless!

Ruth

PS: The week is going great. Crazy to think that this is my last week here. Time flies... even when you have an extra day in the month. Cool experiences since I wrote last... went to night market-lots of cool people and food. No, I didn't taste the fried scorpions.... (Shouldn't a person see a red flag when trying to consume something that contains venom?)  Went running 11 kilometers (6 miles) at 5:00 am in the morning with some people training for Marathons. When else am I going to have the opportunity to run that early with thais in Thailand? (My body is suffering a wee bit)... Tried explaining American hand motions to some Thais. How do you explain why we sometimes use our hands to put quotation marks around what we say? Trying to makes good conversation!... And of course the week has been full of good conversations with great people. God is good. Thanks again for prayers!

Photos and Campus Outreach

Here are two photos from the past few days. The first one is from Thursday night when I went out to eat with Bobby and Katie Hamlett and some family they have in town. Bobby is half-Thai and so some of his mom's family lives in Khon Kaen. It was neat to be able to eat a meal with them in their neighborhood. It gave me a little feel for what Thai neighborhoods are like!

The second picture is of some of the kids from soccer. The three men on the back right have been helping out! Bobby and Pi Mo are on staff with Campus Outreach, and then the guy on the back right is a member of the church. His name is Pi Mai. The soccer clinic is going great and it is really rewarding to see everyone put the skills into practice. They are all doing well!

Let me talk a little about Campus Outreach since that is the ministry I've been able to spend a lot of time around while here! Campus Outreach's ministry is explanatory in the name. But to explain their mission in more words, staff go on campus and build relationships with students with the goal of leading the students to Christ. Then, the staff disciples the new believers with the goal of equipping them to do the same thing as students on campus. I have seen examples of Biblical discipleship everywhere while here. Within the team, there are examples of discipleship. At the church, there are more examples of discipleship. And with the staff on campus, there are especially visible examples of discipleship. I don't think I've ever seen discipleship so clearly displayed. This type of discipleship takes work, patience, faithfulness, and a lot of reliance on God! It is a heavy investment to pour your life into someone, but it is so very Biblical. "For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world, and forfeit his soul? For what will a man give in exchange for his soul?" According to Jesus's economic policy, souls have a huge amount of value in God's eyes. The next logical step in thinking is to say that it would be completely "worth" it to pour your life into something or someone if it at anyway affected the salvation of a soul. (Whole world doesn't match up to a soul so anything else I might do wouldn't either.) Whether the immediate affects of the work is visible or not, "soul work" is worth it. Discipleship is worth it. I pray I'll have this mindset wherever I am! I'm thankful that in my life, there are examples of people who have discipled me. But, I also am very thankful for this opportunity to see discipleship displayed through Campus Outreach in such a clear way. May we all strive to go into all the world and make disciples!

Uncomfortable success

Welp, a little late writing, but I'll try to catch up a bit! The past few days have gone by pretty fast. I've met with several more people, and had some memorable experiences! The above picture is of a game called takraw. It's a cross between soccer, volleyball, gymnastics and kung fu. Super fun to watch.. I'm sure it is even more fun to play. Unfortunately, most girls don't play sports here. It is rather tempting to ask to join though!

One of the highlights of the week was going with Mark Caldwell (missionary with IMB) along with church members to a church plant about 45 min outside of Khon Kaen. I wasn't sure what to expect, but ended up having a great time. I ended up teaching an impromptu english class to about eleven kids! I am still not sure if that was what I was supposed to do, but considering the circumstances, I thought it went pretty well :) I will say though, that the trip out to the church plant definitely put me outside of my comfort zone! My comfort zone is normally pretty big (either because I am comfortable doing a lot of things or I'm ignorant of the circumstances when I should feel uncomfortable), so it was interesting being in a situation when I really wasn't sure of expectations and didn't really feel "comfortable!" Definitely a growing experience, thus an uncomfortable success! On the way back to Khon Kaen, 4 students from the university and I had an impromptu worship session in the back of the car. I will not forget that 30 or so minutes spent singing worship songs in english and thai as I tried to figure them out on the guitar!

On a spiritual level, I think God is really revealing some deep heart issues. I can't remember whether I've written about this or not, so forgive me if you are reading a repeat! Two questions and one idea have been in my mind a lot while I've been here. The idea is the one I know I've mentioned several times before, and that is the idea of living and basking in the journey. God is being faithful to reveal how often I try to skip ahead to the next thing, and consequently miss what He is doing at that moment. Sherry Lewis  mentioned the other day that God works primarily in us and not just through us. I'm realizing that so often, I block out what God is doing in and around me because I'm too busy focusing on what the next thing is that I can do. I don't want to live my whole life looking ahead and missing the present.

"If tomorrow is today, the future is the past. The present was never here; we never let it last. Eyes are in the distant, instead of looking down. Maybe if we started slowing, what was lost would soon be found."

Along with learning to live in journey, the two questions that I've really been wrestling with are: "What satisfies me?", and "Why do I enjoy/do ministry?" 

I think as God peels away the layers of "impulse answers" in my heart, He is revealing to me the sad truth that I am not satisfied with just Him. God is revealing that perhaps some of my motivations for ministry are because I have a desire to feel needed, accomplished, or successful in my own eyes. God is revealing that while my idols are not the big golden buddhas I see quite often around here, my idols come in much more "christian forms" like ministry. Wait, ministry can be an idol? Yes, Ruth, it is an idol in your life. I revel so much in doing the things of God, that I fail to revel in God Himself. I can talk for days about exciting ministry opportunities, but fail to talk for days about the glory of the King Himself. My prayer for the new year was that I would return to my first love, not ministry, but the Lord of ministry. I continue to pray that I will be completely satisfied in God alone, so that my joy does not depend on wherever I am and whatever I'm doing.  If I'm completely satisfied with God, I will not be jumping ahead to "the next thing" because I'll be content living in the journey with Him. God is faithful to reveal things hidden in the depths of my heart! "In Christ alone my hope is found!"

Thank you for your prayers. Please continue to pray for a clear memory and an open and honest heart that is able to evaluate surroundings, conversations and lessons.

Thursday Feb 16

No creative title this time. I'm running out of creative juice! Here are a few pictures taken over the past two days. I went to a Valentines party Tuesday night for some of the student girls involved in Campus Outreach. We had a fun hang-out time, eating junk food and playing games. I enjoyed meeting the girls, talking with them, and passing out my mickey mouse valentines :)

Yesterday, we had the soccer clinic and focused on passing. It went well! I am glad I have an opportunity to hang out with the mks here; they are all a fun group of people. Wednesday night, I went to community team which is like a small group time for some of the people in the church. Since many members of the church are students, they have a time on wednesday nights for non-students to get together, discuss the sermon and have small group fellowship. Katie Hamlett translated for me, so I got to hear what everyone was saying about the sermon on Sunday concerning Luke 9 and following Jesus.

Today, I'm looking forward to eating lunch with Debbie and Leslie Nesbitt who are with a different missions group (not campus outreach) in Khon Kaen. They are wanting to start some small business programs to help "at risk" people. I read somewhere that prostitution constitutes around 4% of Thailand's economy. The largest number of prostitutes come from the region I am in right now known as Isaan.  Isaan refers to the northeast part of Thailand, which contains mostly rural areas. By starting small businesses etc, some families battling material poverty could have a way to earn some money. Many potential prostitutes would have an alternant way to earn money for their families. There are a few missionary families in Khon Kaen, wanting to pursue that type of ministry. Looking forward to meeting with one family today!

Here are some pictures from the past two days

 The sunsets here are beautiful

 Group picture from valentine's party minus a few people

community team meeting

Happy Valentines Day!

This post doesn't really have anything to do with Valentine's Day, besides the fact that it IS Valentine's day! Hope you have a wonderful day celebrating L.O.V.E. (song playing in head by Nat King Cole). But more importantly celebrating Love. (I'm now going on a tangent that wasn't originally intended when I wrote the first sentence). This morning I was reading Knowledge of the Holy by A.W. Tozer. The chapter was about the infiniteness of God and why we should be concerned with that aspect of God! Why? Because the fact that God is infinite means his attributes are infinite as well: Goodness, Mercy, Justice, Love. Infinite God=Infinite Love. Found not in candy hearts, roses or relationships but in Love Himself. Happy Valentine's Day!

Been reading Knowledge of the Holy and it is such a good book! It is very humbling and definitely leads me to worship how great our God is. I definitely suggest it to you!

Sunday, I went to the church that Campus Outreach sponsors. It was bigger than the church in Bangkok, and they have their own building. It was very cool for me to again be able to see and hear church in another language and culture. I also enjoyed making friends afterwards as I passed out American candy that I brought with me :D.

Monday, I led the first of six soccer clinics that I will be doing for the missionary kids while I'm here. We had about 12 kids, and had a lot of fun working on dribbling. I'm glad I have the opportunity to play soccer while I am here and use it to build friendships with the kids here.

I am very much enjoying being able to go out and meet with people, talk, and hear stories of God's work. Over the past few days, I've been able to talk with several people, and I have so enjoyed learning from them! I have had many impactful conversations in just the past few days, and I am now trying to record them all which is proving difficult! I wish I could write all the names of the people I've been talking with and how the conversations have provoked me to think about topics I haven't previously thought a lot about! I hate that I have to be broad, but otherwise this post would go on forever. Anyways, the past few days have been good, filled with conversations that align with the purpose of why I came here: to learn and observe!

Thank you for praying. God is faithful!

hospital visit

So, it sounds bad right? But here, you go to the hospital even if you only need to see a regular doctor. So, Thursday, I went for a hospital visit just to get some meds. It was the first time that I had seen Khon Kaen in the daytime, so it was cool to be able to see the city. It is very different from Bangkok on the main streets but is similar when you turn onto the side streets. The doctor prescribed some medicine just to help clear out my sinuses. I got an antibiotic as well to prevent anything else. Basically, I just have a thaisinusinfectionosis! I guess that is the only scary sounding name I could make up :) But, when the germs are different, its a little harder to conquer. But, no big deal, sickness is sickness and we go on with life!

Yesterday, we had a valentines day party at the small school here for the campus outreach missionary kids. It was great to be able to meet all of the kids and some of their parents. We had a good time! I also got to go out to eat with Snow and Honey, two of the thai women on staff with Campus Outreach. We ate lunch with some of the girls on campus they are discipling. I had my first thai spiciness experience when I accidentally ate something really spicy! It got semi-stuck in my throat so the spiciness kept on coming! Needless to say, my face was probably very red, I was coughing... and crying. Haha I wish I had a picture! But I'm sure the embarrassment will be imprinted in my mind ;) I'm glad I got to have at least one spicy experience. I don't think I need anymore.

Here is a picture of the women I ate lunch with yesterday.

Prayer praise: I'm feeling a lot better hooray! Valentines party went well!

Prayer requests: There are a few bugs going around the team. Please pray for health for them!
Also, while at the hospital, we met two American women. One lives in Thailand, and the other is a missionary in Scotland just visiting Thailand. The missionary in Scotland's husband discovered he had a  7 cm brain tumor while in Thailand and had immediate surgery. It has been a rough, crazy week for them. Not sure the danger of the tumor, but they couldn't remove all of it because it would affect his speech. They are not at home in America, or in Scotland. Can you imagine? I know they would appreciate prayers!
Thank you!! To God be the glory!

sleeeeep

Weeelll... normally I wouldn't be writing at 2:30 am, but I couldn't sleep so I decided I'd do it anyway! The past couple of days have been... relaxing :) Monday afternoon, my throat started hurting and by night, I had a low grade fever. The fever continued until yesterday (wednesday) around noon and then my temperature returned to normal! Yay! But, then my throat started hurting again, and that is why I'm up right now! Having trouble sleeping, partly due to throat hurting, and I've just been having trouble sleeping lately.

So basically, Tuesday and Wednesday, I stayed at the house all day, got some math and journaling done, watched a couple movies, and just had time to think and talk with Mrs. Sherry! (One of the conversations was about love and respect which is something I've been thinking about a lot for about a year... really interesting... and she gave me some more good insight to think about!!) The sickness is good in the fact that I have had to slow down after a busy week in Bangkok. Always interesting to find positives in something that is seemingly negative.  Then I can take the next step to not just finding positives in negative circumstances but giving thanks in all circumstances. Thank you God for allowing me to get sick. God is using it for good in ways only He can. I'm also really thankful that it is not a stomach sickness. That is what I was afraid of the most so I'm very glad Im not having intestinal issues! Also thankful that I got sick here in Khon Kaen instead of in Bangkok. Mrs. Sherry is taking care of me and giving me good medicine!

Anyways all that to say, I am thankful for how God is using these.... but I really would like to be sleeping through the night and feeling better :) So, please pray for wellness! Muchas gracias!

Haha speaking of being sick, just found this on the internet. I love witty humor.

Pictures from Khon Kaen/church in Bangkok

 Before we left for the airport, we took a group picture at the church of some people I'd been spending time with.

 During worship at the church

 Sharing testimony with Pi Da translating

 Part of Bangkok skyline.. there is a whole lot more!

 Monday morning party at Firpos's house... watching the super bowl. Dedicated Americans waking up at 6:30 am to watch... I woke up at 8:00.

 My thai lesson with girl from plane

Find the white squirrel!!

Green and Blue

The title for the blog post doesn't have much significance except that here in Khon Kaen, everything is much more green and blue! Blue sky and lots more plants and animals than in Bangkok.

I arrived in Khon Kaen on Sunday night after a 45 minute plane ride from Bangkok. Again, God used the journey! Apparently, I'm still not grasping the lesson! :). On the plane ride, I sat next to a 15 year old girl who wanted to practice her English. She started a conversation with me, and by the end of the plane ride, she had given me a thai lesson, and I had given her an English lesson! She asked for my email address, and so I gave it to her. Maybe she will email me, maybe not, but there is a possible future correspondence there! As we were standing, about to exit the plane, she reached into her bag and gave me a gift. (Really good smelling soap). Pretty cool!

Sherry Lewis and Katie Hamlett picked me up from the airport. (Two missionaries here with Campus Outreach). I am staying with Sherry and Mark Lewis and their daughter Sophie while I'm here in Khon Kaen. Their house is beautiful and the room I'm staying in is great! Everyone is very nice here, though it is quite a change from being with all Thais in Bangkok to being with all Americans! But, I'm looking forward to meeting everyone... and eating more cheese :D

I've been thinking a lot about the contrasts between American culture and Thai culture. I ate lunch with the Alywards yesterday (another family with Campus Outreach here) and Mrs. Robin and I talked about how the differences in culture change the way you do evangelism and discipleship. I've been exposed to a lot of different cultures and have always known there are differences, but it is amazing how many pre-conceived notions you have just due to where you have grown up. I'm still working through a lot of these thoughts as I talk with various missionaries here. But I'm really excited about the opportunities I have to just hear from all of these people and their life experiences, observations and lessons learned. There are missionaries here who have been here for one year, fifteen years, missionaries who have lived in other places before coming to thailand etc. I'm just really excited about learning from everyone and building relationships with people who are passionate about following Christ and making disciples.

Back to the whole culture thing, just a small example. But in the airport the other day, we were all trying to decide where to go eat. Some wanted american food (subway) others wanted Thai. Well the American I am decided we should take a vote! So I asked who wanted to go where etc. Then I jokingly made a comment about American democracy. When I think about that, I wonder if they had ever decided by voting before. In the US, sure that's a common way of solving indecisiveness, but in a culture that has a King, is that how it works? Since those Thais were familiar with American culture etc, they were probably familiar with a voting process. But unlike me, that would probably not have been their first solution to make a desicion. I realize that is a small example. But it's things that I normally wouldn't even consider as being significant (like decision making) that really reveal background. Anyways, I've just been thinking about some pre conceived notions (cultural and non cultural) that I consider the right way of doing things just because that is how I've always done them. The way I do church, the way I study the Bible, the way I process things. I am in no way advocating relativism, but I do think there are plenty of things we consider right, not because it is RIGHT but because that is how we have always done them. Its been interesting to make comparisons and Im excited about being in a different culture for 5 weeks straight.

Last Paragraph, I went to the Thai church on Sunday, and it was really neat to be able to see church in a different language. I think that may have been the first time I've ever sat in a church service in a different country that wasn't in English. There were about 35 people but it was awesome to see how they worshipped together. I also had the opportunity to share my testimony. You know, my testimony is very different than most of the people here. I've been raised in a Christian family. Many of them are the only ones in their family who are Christians. I  tend to put an emphasis on "good" and "bad" testimonies in the States. Oh you know, "so-and-so" was in prison, on drugs, and then Jesus  came in and completely changed their lives and saved them from sin." Praise God!  But wait, Ruth has always known about Jesus, been home schooled her whole life, went to Awanas every wednesday... and Jesus saved her life... and we think "Yay praise God. But in reality we think, "so-and-so" certainly brings more glory to Jesus (has a better testimony), because there is evident, radical change. Wait, who am I to downplay the blood of Jesus Christ? Who I am to say that God's grace was "better" in one person's life than in another? Testimonies aren't about the person. They are about God! God never changes and sure his grace is displayed differently, but the results are the same. "I once was lost, but now I'm found." Praise God. That church wanted to hear my testimony. So Ruth could talk? No, so God is glorified. Maybe it took me sharing my testimony in front of people who were unfamiliar with the typical Bible belt testimony to realize that it's not about the differences in testimonies, but the consistency of God's grace.

Okay, for real this is the last paragraph. I know this is a long post, but that's what I get for blogging before writing in my journal. Thank you for your prayers. God is working and showing me things...maybe not what I expected but lessons none-the-less. Please pray for a good clear memory to remember what He is teaching me and the perseverance to write it all down! Also, I'm sick :/ I thank God it isn't stomach virus sick but I had a fever this morning and it's making me feel lousy. It is kind of a praise too because it makes me sit down and rest :) So, I'm thanking God for making me sick and at the same time praying I'll feel better! hah.  Thanks for reading to the end. To God be the glory!

Last night in Bangkok (until I am headed back to States). Just uploaded some random pictures from throughout the week; hope it helps with visual! Today, we took a trip to Ayutthaya which is a different province and also the name of the second capital of Thailand. We saw ruins that are about 800 years old. The history buff that I am loved it. And, the human being that I am loved being able to breathe fresh air that isn't city air :) There was a big group of us that went out there, and I really enjoyed spending time with everyone...
 I am really looking forward to going to Khon Kaen and settling down there for the rest of the trip, but I will definitely miss everyone here!
About to get off internet so quick report... Praises: I haven't gotten sick! Hooray! I've eaten quite a few things that I would think would have gotten me sick(lots of street food), but God has spared me thus far. Thank you for your prayers! Another praise is I'm learning more of the language. A lot of people in Bangkok speak English, but I'm not sure of the percentage in Khon Kaen.
Can't wait to see what the next four weeks hold!
Until next time,
Ruth

 Grand Palace-lots of gold and lots of color

 Ayutthaya- Ancient ruins about 800 years old

 Dont remember this elephant's name... but I rode on that little bench thing!

 thai meal at home of a girl from church-yep thats a whole fish

 Some people from church and a few others

 Buddha idols are everywhere

Falang-what Thai people call foreigners. AKA Guava: (Hint: the inside is very white)

Sawaddee ka!

Hello from Bangkok! I have had limited access to wifi while I've been here so I'm just now writing. But wow, the past... (think through jet lagged brain) 3 days have gone really well. The city is big. The people are so nice. And the food is rice and noodles :) hah. I'm not quite sure where to start, and since it is 10:40 pm here right now, I don't have too long!

Ah yes! Let me start with the flight over here because God did not hesitate to start working and answering prayers! One of the previous posts was about how the journey is just as important as the destination. Let me just say, God. Answers. Prayers. I had been praying that mentally, I would learn not only while I was in Thailand, but while I was prepping for the trip etc. But I was also praying literally that God would use the 24 hours of travel time. He did!
I can't say i was expecting to use my spanish on a flight to Asia, but that is just how God works. From ATL to Tokyo, I sat for 13 hours next to a young woman who spoke little English... from Peru. About two hours in, she asked me, "Hablas espanol?" It took me a few seconds to realize that she was actually speaking spanish beacause I was so in shock. We then continued our conversation off and on the whole ride. I didn't openly share the gospel with her, but I shared swedish fish, my pillow, and helped her with her customs form. I know she saw me reading my Bible, so my only hope is that she put two and two together! Who knows if God is working in her life. But, if nothing else, he certainly worked in mine! Sitting next to that girl was like God was reassuring me, "See Ruth, the journey is vital. And you can trust me to answer prayers. I'm in total control." Basic lessons, but lessons that we have to learn over and over. That certainly started the trip off with an encouraging start!

Since that time, the encouragement has continued! The believers that I have spent my week with are so passionate about pursuing Christ and encouraging each other. Iron sharpens Iron and when you are part of less than 1% in the country, you really rely on each other!  Just seeing how they interact with each other is such an encouragement. I've had the opportunity to go to two "care groups" which are their small groups for their church, and both times were just fellowship, worship, and prayer. The Church stripped down to the core. So cool considering that most of them are the only ones in their family who are Christians. Most have been Christians for 5 years or less, and yet are walking very closely with the Lord, and very mature in their faith. God changes lives, and I love being able to see that right here in Bangkok.

I've also spent the last few days just seeing the city and Thai Culture. Soaking it all in. I love just watching the culture, the people, customs etc. I can't write too much more, so quick list. I have seen a lot of: street vendors-everywhere, monks-everywhere, temples-everywhere, gold-everywhere, pictures of the king-everywhere.

I have not seen a lot of: bread, cheese (two things I miss already) Falang (foreigners-literally means "Guava" because they are so white ;) hah) Though I did see a good bit in the two big tourist destinations I've gone to.

Cant wait to writ more about what I've seen, heard, smelled. Cant wait to write about the people I've talked to. Thank you for praying. God is faithful all the time!
Ruth